Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Free shit

I’m at Oracle OpenWorld this week.

It’s one of the biggest technology tradeshows in the world and my company – with about a bazillion others – has a booth here.

Our goal is to talk to people who might be interested in what we do.

The goal of most attendees is to grab as many giveaways as possible.
“Can I have that? What is it?” - Idiotic woman at our booth yesterday.

I’m sorry for yelling, but there’s nothing like a good trade show to remind you how fucking greedy and stupid some people can be.

And I’m convinced that if I placed a small turd on the counter at our booth, within five minutes someone would walk away with it.
What is it about free stuff that makes people so nutty?

I don’t get it.

These folks are professionals, too. The same people who could totally afford to spend a buck on a tchotchke from Walgreen's will grovel and whine for the tiny plastic pieces of crap that companies hand out at trade shows.
It’s football season and the Chicago Bears are 6 – 0, so we decided to do a tailgating theme in our booth this year.

We’re running Super Bowl highlights on a 42” plasma TV, which is the Grand Prize to one Randomly Selected Winner. Wink wink.

We’re handing out Koozies (not what you’re thinking, Lisa, but that certainly would make for an interesting giveaway) to everyone.

And to complete the tailgate theme, we’ve got Baggo. It’s fun. The lucky few who actually get the beanbag in the hole receive a 12-pack soft-sided cooler that folds flat, making it easy to take home from the show. All of this stuff is emblazoned with our corporate logo, of course.

It’s worked out pretty well so far – traffic through the booth was steady for the eight hours we spent in the exhibit hall yesterday.

But I’m almost regretting having great giveaways because it increases the idiot factor exponentially.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want free stuff. Free implies very little value. Free shit takes up space.

And don’t we all need less shit in our lives?
I am listening to: Just Jack - Snowflakes
I am reading: USA Today
And I am: Disgusted


the dilf said...

2 things....1.)I am the KING of Baggo...I'll take on Anyone for Anything...even for a FREE GIFT...and 2.)I've always wanted a Koozie, but i Just Cant Get My Wife to Give me ONE!!!!!!!:(