Merry Deathmas

“Speaking of death,” I say to Mom this morning. “Jim knows, but I’m telling you too: I want to be cremated with no viewing.”

“Ditto,” she says.

“Great. When we’re dead we’ll finally agree on something.”
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It’s been a few funeral-filled months here for family and close friends.

So the typically benign morbid underbelly to the season seems a little more – I don’t know – painful and poignant this year.

What is it about Christmas that makes us think of death?
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The week leading up to Christmas is right about the time I start listening to Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics.

This excellent CD is an irreverent respite from all the Silent Nights and Joy to the Worlds and O Holy Mary Jesus Hoo-Ha Blahs.

My all-time favorite is Merry F*cking Christmas, sung by Mr. Garrison.

You’re in a mad scramble for last minute gifts, sweating your ass off in a store and swearing at the sonofabitch who snatched the last Scooby Doo Chia Pet from the shelf.

Get in your car. Take a deep breath. And sing Merry F*cking Christmas at the top of your lungs.

Trust me. It helps.
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Then there’s this pretty, melancholy tune from the South Park CD that’s been playing over and over in my head:

Dead, dead, dead
Someday you’ll be dead
Dead, dead, dead
Someday we’ll all be dead

The minute we’re born we start dying
We die a little more every day
Young or old, rich or poor
There’s nothing we can do to stop it
So look long at that Christmas tree
It may be the last one that you see
Decorate your house in green and red
‘Cause someday you’ll be dead

Dead, dead, dead
Someday you’ll be dead
Dead, dead, dead
Someday we’ll all be dead
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The holidays are high pressure. It’s forced festivity and gift giving.

Add to it the crazy concept that this Could Be the Last One for anyone of us and shit, it’s no small wonder the suicide rate is so high this time of year.

I don't know, to me the whole Christmas/death thing is kinda comforty. I appreciate everyone a little more. And it makes all the blessings shine just a little bit brighter.

Of course if this is my last Christmas, I also can look forward finally agreeing with Mom.
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I am listening to: Mr. Hankey’s Christmas Classics
I am reading: Niagaran Pebbles
And I am: Living