Detroit: We Don’t Do That

“This doesn’t look good,” says Jim.

We’d been westbound on I-94 maybe 20 minutes when suddenly it was nothing but brake lights ahead.

This is not good any time, of course, but especially at 11 a.m. on a Sunday.

Something big was happening.

We slowed down and waited. After a bit, we started inching forward again and I could see that everyone was merging to the right – serious merging – all the way off the road merging.

Something big indeed.

At least two feet of water across all eight lanes – east and west bound. Idiots driving through the deepest parts. All of us bright (scared) folks waiting our turn to ride up the curb/embankment.

“I’m dialing 911,” I say. “It’s obvious this didn’t just happen but there’s no one here directing traffic. The road should be closed.”

9-1-1

Ring…ring…ring…ring…ring…

“Thank you for calling Detroit 9-1-1. All of our operators are busy right now. Please hold for the next available operator.”

I wait. For what seems like forever but was probably a minute at most. Good thing I wasn’t having a stroke or coronary or something really important.

“Detroit 9-1-1 how can I help you?”

“There’s deep standing water across all of I-94 just north of exit 220.”

“I’ll transfer you to the State police.”

CLICK.

Ring…ring…ring…ring…ring…

“State police are you reporting an accident?”

“No, there’s deep standing water across all of I-94 just north of exit 220.”

“We don’t do that. We’ll notify MDOT.”

We don’t do that?

WE DON’T DO THAT?

There’s a hazardous situation on a major state road and “We don’t do that”?

Gotta love Detroit.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am listening to: CNN on the office TV
I am reading: Nothing, still basking in the glow of Between the Bridge and the River by Craig Ferguson
And I am: Not surprised, sadly enough