Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Pride, goeth

“I have to ask this: Are you afraid of anyone in your house?” said the nurse.

Maybe it was delirium from the pain but I couldn’t help myself and burst out laughing.

“Just the floor,” I said through wincey giggles.

Apparently they have to ask these things when you’re in the Emergency Room with what appears to be a totally borked arm.
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That was yesterday morning.

I stepped out on the deck to let the dogs out (Gromit is begrudgingly puppy-sitting a black Lab named Scout this week.) When I came back in the kitchen, the combination of new shoes plus wet from the deck knocked my feet right out from under me.

It happened sofast that I didn’t have time to catch myself and I landed squarely on my right shoulder.
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Now I’m on the couch watching HGTV with a Diet Pepsi and some chocolate chip cookie dough, which is the Recommended Treatment in cases such as this.
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Contusion, upper arm.

That’s what the ER doctor says it is. No broken bones but it feels like someone is poking me in the shoulder with a steak knife that desperately needs sharpening.

I am swearing a lot – which is completely normal – so I can’t be too hurt.
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Have you noticed the new “Blog Stuff” section to the right?

It’s an effort to gain readership. Of course the Internet is extremely helpful with such things.

As a Marketing Professional (oooh, aaah) you’d think I would’ve been all over promoting HedyBlog for the past year or so.

Nope.

It’s been a hobby up to this point. But we’re just about ready to remove the training wheels.
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Here are the 10 things I’ve learned about blogging so far:

1) There are a bazillion bloggers out there on the Internets
2) There are maybe 10 good ones
3) We’re all a bunch of egomaniacal blabber-mouths who think our opinions are way more important and interesting than they actually are
4) You can be a veritable Rock Star by posting on a regular basis – many of the blogs I found hadn’t been updated in months
5) I’d much rather write content than fiddle-fuck around with HTML
6) Linking to other bloggers builds readership: The blogosphere is one ginormous circle jerk in which we all get rich by pointing to each other’s inane content
7) It’s unclear where the money is coming from, but I’m sure it has something to do with porn
8) There are bad writers with good thoughts and good thinkers who write badly; getting the goods in one blog is extremely rare
9) Soliciting for donations on blogs is fairly common; I rue the day when readers have to say, “I remember when HedyBlog was FREE!”
10) Using phrases like ‘rue the day’ will not help you build readership.
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I actually like hospitals. The clean, comforty energy. The maddening slow efficiency of it all.

And with the two knee injuries in 2004, the chest pain/rib incident late last year, and now this, I’m practically a regular.

“Heather! Welcome back! Your regular gurney?”
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“Someone linked to me! I’m linked to someone!” I shouted from the couch, waking up Jim who was snoozing with the doggies in front of the TV show Heroes Monday night.

As instructed, I ‘claimed my blog’ on the Technorati web site and found out that someone had already linked to me. Yay, me!

The site is called Buzz Customer. Thank you, Buzz Customer!
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So, Little Miss Karma, what have YOU been up to? Hmm?

Nothing. Really.

I haven’t done anything particularly bad in at least a few months.

Sometimes a fall is just a fall (apologies to Freud.)

And of course, sometimes a blog is just a blog.
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I am listening to: A very quiet house
I am reading: Steinberg
And I am: Humbled

7 comments:

Drib said...

HA...porn has something to do with everything on the internet, I think.

Hope your arm gets better.

the dilf said...

I think you fell, cuz you keep writing about porn...you sick perverted woman.....Maybe you keep writing about it is cuz Jim is just not gettin it done...CMON JIM...STEP UP!

Hey... this porkolt.com is hmmmm...i guess you could say, is Very Interesting..what's great about it, is that it's FREE...you know, FREE is my favorite 4 letter F word

On the political front..the c*nts won almost everything in Minny...I'm amazed that these Complete Morons can win an election by 2 ways....1.)Bashing the other candidate and 2.)Blabbering "I'm for Change!"....What the F*ck does that mean??? I hate Politicians. I believe we never get any good one's due to the media and basically blogs on the internet. Here's why..Everyone's skeletons get pulled out from 20 yrs ago. I sure as hell wouldnt want my college life brought to the forefront. I could get put in jail(with the wife) as would most of us. AND my wife might find out who the real me is/was. AND most of us now have kids. Does anyone really want their kids and wife to find out about the drugs and uhhh..well...Let's say the "Group Sessions" that occured back then... I sure dont! (even tho i was a v*rgin when i got married!!!)..My Closet is shut...FOR GOOD!

Hedy said...

Thanks, Drib!

Hedy said...

I used to say that I wouldn't want to elect someone who hasn't lived a little (of course Bush Junior screwed the pooch on that concept.) It's like getting marriage advice from a priest -- is this guy really gonna understand what us average folks are all about if he hasn't been there, done that? In Barack Obama's new book he says he "got stoned, maybe did a little blow" in college. He's the best candidate I've seen in years and I say Rock on, Barack!

bmwmp said...

At least you didn't have to say....."I've fallen down and I can't get up!" Get well soon....AGAIN!.

Dave said...

Came across your blog randomly using blogmad. Enjoyed your posts.

Jamie said...

Heather! Did you really not address the elections from yesterday in this entry???