Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Technology is a dirty little bitch

Best Buy Trip #1: Purchase new printer because parents' old printer is being a dirty little bitch and doesn't work any more.

Discover fancy schmancy new printer won't work with Windows Millenium Edition.

Best Buy Trip #2: Purchase Windows XP Home Edition.

Install new operating system. Discover new operating system is a dirty little bitch and won't support internal modem.

"Go to blahmodems-dot-com to download current drivers."

Well if the dirty little bitch of a modem was working, we could do that couldn't we?

Drive to Panera for wireless in hopes of downloading drivers to Mac.

"Our wireless is down. It could be down for just a few minutes or the whole night," says the dirty little bitch behind the counter.

Best Buy Trip #3: Explain modem situation to Geek. Geek suggests purchasing new modem for $40. Purchase new modem.

Tear apart computer, attempt to insert new modem card. Discover new modem card is a dirty little bitch and is too big.

Best Buy Trip #4: Take too big modem card and computer to Geeks for help. Get ridiculed by Geeks for bringing in 'antique' computer. Realize receipt for too big modem is at home. Get external/usb modem.

Install new new modem. Install new printer. Connect to Internet. Rejoice loudly whilst cursing Microsoft, Best Buy and Geeks - the lot of them, dirty little bitches.

Best Buy Trip #5: Return too big modem.
I am listening to: Plain White T's - All That We Needed
I am reading: HP 6
And I am: Tired of technology


Posolxstvo said...

But is it "robust?"

s.ray said...

why the "F" are you working on a windows based computer?.....Get "boot camp" for your apple and buy microsoft "office" for mac!
-also, I'm great with any sexual issues too:)

Hedy said...

The jury's still out on robust, Pos. As long as Mom can read e-mail and (hopefully) HedyBlog, I don't care as long as I don't have to go to Best Buy again.

S. Ray: Yer preachin' to the choir, my friend. But I also need to know my audience. My parents do not have cable and are still on AOL v7.0. These people are serious, serious creatures of habit and until Mac technology has been around for say, 50 years, they will NOT be trying it. Also, you're offering to help my parents with any sexual issues? That's fabulous because a) EWWWW and b) I'm quite certain the Geeks at Best Buy would be completely useless in that area. :)

s.ray said...

oops....guess I missed the very 1st line about it being your parents...Sorry Mom!

Dave said...

You're doing computer house calls to Michigan? You need to get going on Monday.

Don't ever go to Vista. None of your peripheral drivers work and the dirty little bitches at Canon won't support them for a four year old digital camera and a three year old hot-shit ink jet printer.

Sorry Mom.