She’s sitting down below. But her voice is cutting a powerful, destructive swath through the entire train car. She’s a Category 3 Yapper.
And her mouth is goin’ like a Whip-poor-will’s ass.
A Whip-poor-will’s ass, Hedy?
Yep.
This is a lovely, colorful colloquila…colloquilia…coloquilias…eh, fuck it, expression that us Michiganders use for when someone is talking way too much.
I’ve always wondered if Whip-poor-wills tend to poop a lot. Or maybe they’re just really really fast. No clue.
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Bonus points if you know from whence came the title of today’s blog.
Jesus. It took me 15 minutes to figure out how to write that sentence and I still ain't sure it's right.
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Shit-ass is another Michigan phrase. Shit-ass is what Da called us kids when we were being punks. Punks. Another oft-used Michigan word. Occasionally combined with ass. For punk-ass. Not to be confused with shit-ass.
So, to review. Hedy still doesn’t know how to spell colloquilia…whatever. We have lots of quaint ass-related phrases from whence I came.
And that'll be enough yapping for today.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am listening to: Deeper Than the Holler by Randy Travis
I am reading: Jigging in the afterlife
And I am: Getting a dictionary
3 weeks ago
16 comments:
That was my train ride home yesterday as well. A first timer commuter on the phone speaking in russian/polish on the top of her voice.
Once again, me, sitting in the lower level facing the passengers and this lady sitting a seat apart in my front.
How do I know a first timer... she hangs up and talks to me about her trip into the immigration office in Chicago. The train being a convenient ride, blah blah blah.
Remember.. I said sitting a seat apart... so she's literally shouting out to me over the heads of the nice little ladies sitting between us.
Sheesh... probably need all the Michigan generated words to describe that person.
WOO: "To speak in the vernacular of the peasantry, 'Poor little kid. I hope she gets home alright.'" - Professor Marvel.
Google is my friend.
Does the word ass-hat originate from MI too?
Did Da ever use the term "pot-licker"?
That word/words were long time favorites for my Pop to use when he was aggravated with one of us kids. "You pot-licker!" he would exclaim.
Not exactly sure of where that saying came from or what it meant in his head. The one thing I am sure of - when yelling started I usually didn't stay.
ran away
Susan! I just yelled "OH MY GOD POT-LICKER!" in my office. Now they think I'm nuts, but THANK YOU for remembering one of my all time favorites. Pot-licker remains one of Da's standard insults. Hilarious.
I feel like I need to explain to you people, the truth about hedy the politician. She calls herself "Middle of the Road"...or a "Libertarian." Actually, it's untrue. VERY untrue. She may disagree, but I believe I've figured her out.
-She loves BIG..BIG Gov't
-Gov't should control everything
-Enron was bad...so EVERY business is EVIL
-All companies should lower their prices (forced by gov't)
-Anyone who makes money...is Greedy and Pure Scum!
-Taxpayers should pay for all b**b jobs!
back to her point...In Michigan terms, we call her type
"Commies"
Here's the back story on the Dilf's comment: He LOST an argument via IM yesterday regarding the politics of Barack Obama. Here's what you need to know about the Dilf: He's a greedy, Cheney-lovin' free marketeer who would steal candy from small children (perhaps even his OWN children) if it meant he could save a buck somehow. He's like a combination of Scrooge and the Grinch, only less charming. To defend myself on his points:
- I can't stand BIG government. If BIG business would just be smart and play by the rules we wouldn't need more regulations in response to the mortgage crisis or Enron or the tech bubble or whatever scandal of the year we're facing.
- The government should help the people who really need it and stay the hell away from the rest of us. I'm actually for privatizing education - make it a business and hold shareholders accountable - then you'll see real progress and no more of this no child left behind bullshit.
- Enron was shameful. So is the current mortgage crisis - and we're not talking one or two companies but big, big firms who seriously ought to have known better this time. Before that it was tech firms raping stockholders and killing our 401(k)s. Before that it was the S&L scandal. And yes, I am predicting a major financial scandal related to the bio tech industry within the next five years. I'm NOT saying gov't is the answer - but too many small investors are hurt by these major scandals every few years and something REALLY needs to be done about it.
- I love love love smart people who make wads of money through hard work, innovation and creativity - that is at the heart of Democracy and is the American Way. I AM NOT OKAY with smart, greedy people bilking ignorant, naive people and then expecting the government to clean up the mess.
- Dilf, you ignorant slut. Shaddap and sit down until you get your facts straight. Wait. I know. It's been a while since the wife touched your peepee and that's why you're so foggy-headed today. Go home, get that situation all straightened out and then come back fresh tomorrow, k?
WOW, Hedy, you Michiganians are hard-core. You guys would have eaten me for lunch if I, by some flukey chance, had managed to move into your neighborhood as a kid in the 70's.
I think I would have been (as I am now) terrified of Dilf ... but would have wanted to watch Brady Bunch with you!
You're the number two result on Google for your title.
Dave... she's slipping. She was #1 this morning! #2 is better anyway. They try harder!
I cheated too, Dave.
H -- help me out. I'm trying to figure this whole DILF thing out. So you know this person? A friend? Adversary? Stalker? What?
And, (Dilf, feel free to answer this for yourself) is he for real, or is he just a shit-stirrer? Seems like he only comments when he want to try to get a rise out of you.
Am I misreading this?
Pos: The Dilf (self-named) and I have known each other since high school. He definitely enjoys stirring the pot (and that's NOT a euphemism in this case) - he loves controversy and debating and usually steps in to try and liven us up a bit. Overall we give each other tons of light-hearted crap -- but it's no more than I receive from my husband, our friends and all the other Republican types in our group who put up with my "bleeding heart liberal" ways. Although Dilf likes to portray himself as a bad-ass, he is completely harmless and actually quite feeble when confronted with logic, facts and reason. :)
Okay. Sounds reasonable.
By the way, 'colloquialism'
If you ever need a word, let me know. I have a warehouse of em. Sometimes they're even helpful. Just ask Molly.
Pos....all of your comments are fairly accurate...I really do enjoy needling hedy...it's just fun. Plus, I read a lot of blogs, and so many of the people, that send in comments, just agree with the blog writer so often. It drives me crazy. How can a blog writer have, say, 12 comments that all agree with him/her? Hedy and I disagree on tons of things, i.e. (I'm cool...she's a dork) but we have a blast just disagreeing with each other and I have to admit, she has gotten me to believe her side of the story...maybe....once.
Oh yeah..she also hates that I'm smarter than her!
And Molly! I'd watch Brady Bunch with you any time! :)
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
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