Friday, January 04, 2008

A message from the dark side

First, a reading assignment for you:

Happy Introvert Day

Finally, someone explains the dark and mysterious world of introverts.

Finally, we have our holiday.

And I sure feel like celebratin'. Alone. With a good book, a cuddly blanket, and a Diet Pepsi.

My name is Hedy, and I am an introvert.

It doesn't mean I'm anti-social. It doesn't mean I don't like you and don't want to spend time with you.

It means that I'm better in small, couple-based situations versus large crowds. It means some days I just Don't Feel Like Talking. To anyone.

It means I need time alone to recharge. And if I don't get it, I become an Insufferable Bitch.
I really wish I'd written this: "Introverts crave meaning, so party chitchat feels like sandpaper to our psyche."

Diane Cameron is the woman who launched Introvert Day. Bless her solitary, dark heart. She'd be our Queen if all of us introverts actually thought we needed a leader.
"You? An insufferable bitch? Gee, Hed, that's hard to imagine."

"Fine. You don't want to spend time with us. Fine. We've got other friends. Fine. We'll never stop in again. Fine. We'll work off your Special Bitch Schedule."

Just a prediction.

If you're a friend or family member and you're thinking any of that right now, do me a favor would ya please? SHUT THE FUCK UP.

I've been an introvert my whole life and I know how/when to deal with overload.

Furthermore, if you've known me for more than a month, you know it, too. Because you've seen me shut down and disappear, not returning calls or e-mails. You also know that, like a stray mutt, I always come back around eventually.

Listen: One of the single greatest blessings of my life is that at any given moment, any number of friends, neighbors, kids, and pets might stop in for a visit. I love that. And there's no amount of alone time that could ever equal an unexpected afternoon with the people I love most.

I may be an introvert, but I'm not an idiot.
I am listening to: Nothing
I am reading: The Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
And I am: Quiet


Posolxstvo said...

I'd respond, but you look like you want to be left alone.

But if you are interested, you may want to check out this item that I ran across some time ago...

Top 5 Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts by Brian Kim.

Hedy said...

Thank you, Pos! That one is even better than the one I found. I love the explanation of how we're just wired differently. And how we're energized by alone time versus being with people. I've always been amazed at people - especially politicians and hard-core volunteer types who seem to THRIVE on going and doing all the time. I get exhausted just hearing about all the stuff they do (Lisa!). Thanks for this.

msmoo1 said...

Being an extrovert – it was hard for me to relate;
That being surrounded with people doesn’t just satiate;
I can still flit and fly from one place to the next with not much rest;
And if I am doing the entertaining at my home I am at my best!
But with age, comes wisdom and I am beginning to get that I am being led;
By a very small voice from my childhood still stuck in my head;
“Being idle is lazy, unproductive and bad!”;
Were words I heard often being spoken by my Dad;
So I have become a little more accepting of you introvert kind;
Understanding that “down time” is good for the mind!


the dilf said...

yo hedy...your "introvertedness" makes you intriguing...or "mysterious" sort of shows in your blog, because you also disappear for days at a time with your writing.
I've been trying to figure out what I am. I like about 10% of the people out there, and I just love being around that group that I like. But the other 90% annoy the sh*t outta me and I can't stand being around them.
I also have this unbelievable urge, to tell them, that I hate them. Some being the loud mouth bimbos that my wife hangs out with. My wife says she knows exactly what I's called a "Jerk." But I just can't force myself to be fake. Should I stop being a "jerk" or just be myself? Help Hedy, before I spiral down the drain!!!

Anonymous said...

I am an introvert pervert. Where do I fit in?

Hedy said...

Dilf! If talking about poop makes me mysterious, then mission accomplished! (Sorry, couldn't resist.)

You're probably an introvert. Like the article said, introverts crave meaning and have a hard time with bimbotic small talk.

I'm with you. The select group of people I love, I love being around. But I can't stand wasting precious time on people I can't stand. I don't really know the best answer for handling your situation, but I do know that being fake isn't it. I used to just speak my mind and call people on their bullshit, but now I find it's best to shut up and avoid them. At a very basic level I know we're all human beings and we deserve to be loved equally, but for me it's much easier to love the majority of them when they're not around. :)

Hedy said...

Anonymous: An introvert pervert? Like that's unusual? I can only speak for myself, but I'm guessing most introverts are perverts. Why do you think we crave all that 'alone' time? ;)