Thursday, February 08, 2007

WELL? We're waiting

“HEDY! Do NOT put your TITS on the INTERNET!”

That was my Mom this morning. She’s known me for almost 40 years. Yet she doesn’t know if I’ll do it or not.

Well, she acts like it anyway.

No matter how old you get, moms always have to remind you to do (or not do) things.

It’s a good thing.
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Tap tap tap tap tap. Tap tap tap tap tap.

That’s me, waiting rather impatiently for photos of all my loyal HedyBlog fans to start rolling in.

What the hell happened? Camera broke? Stage fright?
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I should’ve known when Monday came and first thing outta the shoot, I got the “sorry if we crossed the line” thing.

Hilarious.

The same guy who’ll yell “SHOW YER TITS!” at a NASCAR race will go home and grovel to his wife for whatever.

It's very cute.
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I actually received a photo from one brave soul last night.

And all I have to say is: Now I understand why they call you Spike.
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I am listening to: The best of Sugar Ray
I am reading: PeopleSoft 9.0 invite draft
And I am: Perky

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

do we get to see the photo of "Spike?"

Hedy said...

NO...but it was SPECTACULAR.

Dave said...

I'm not getting involved in this cyber game of chicken, other than saying, Hedy, I thought that you said if one of your readers sent you a picture of their nether regions, you would reciprocate.

As a lawyer and a born facilitator, since Spike, and since you referred to "it," I assume he's a he, showed you, you have a contractual obligation (remember, I'm a lawyer), based on the legal principal of promissory estoppel, to show him yours.

The real reason for my comment:

1. How come for the most part we don't see your Mom's comments? Are all of her responses by phone while you're in the car on the way to the station?

2. More importantly, and the thought I had that was the reason for my comment, being the expert that you are, you need to weigh in, I thought most guys used the word "tits" and women preferred "boobs." In your original post you described your newly svelt secondary sexual appendages as boobs. You quote your Mother as describing them as tits. I'd like you to think about this on the train and post the results.

By the way, even though Spike has a great lawsuit, you can defend it by claiming literary license.

Hedy said...

Brilliant, Dave! And truly hilarious. Thank you; I was hoping some brave soul might jump in like this. Let me do my best to respond. While the photo I received bears a striking resemblance to Spike, we here at HedyBlog can’t be certain it’s him. Further investigation is required. The larger issue, however, involves the fact that so far Spike has declined to allow me to publish said photo – a non-negotiable part of the original agreement. Next, I’m not sure why people (including my Mom) don’t comment on the blog more often; it sure would be nice. Last, I prefer boobs. I’m pretty sure my Mom prefers boobs, too. However, I am a journalist at heart and quoted her accurately. Perhaps she liked the quasi-alliteration of ‘tits on the Internet.’ Ta-da!

Dave said...

I withdraw my opinion that Spike has a good lawsuit. Based on your advice that he submitted the pic with the proviso that it not be published, and your uncertainty that "it" is indeed his "it", I feel you have no obligation, legal or otherwise to publish "yours."

An aside, someone really sent a picture of an "it?" Beyond the ballsiness of sending it, I'm impress with his Google skills of putting a .jpg in a comment.

Finally, what is up with your readers? Writers need stroking. Your writing is worthy of an at least a transitory stroke.

Anonymous said...

Dave is 100% right!....it's time for hedyboobs!